and i go around telling people, "hey, everything's going to be ok"
but when it comes to myself,
i need more than "everything's going to be ok".


this is not about one major issue, there's more.
ive been thinking about stuffs since i dont know when..
since 21 november.
according to my diary.
maybe earlier, but i didnt bother checking.


ive been wanting to ask like a gazillion questions.
where? with? when? what?

and i want to know like a gazillion stuffs to answer the questions.
but i know.
just one sentence,just one. would answer those gazillion questions.
and yes. ive heard about it.
maybe its just me not living up to the fact/truth/reality.

i think i need more than a listening ear.
like every other person, assurance is the key.

and i wished someone was up as early as me, and be reading this.

ok. its 9 57. in the morning.
i just had my bath and im set to go to school
to meet the classmates.
and i feel the need to do this right now.
i can do it later, but i chose to do it now.


dont ask me why.
its raining like so heavily out there.

........
..............
and that feeling was just the hell most crappiest ive felt ever since..
ever since?
ever since. you came
[/edited]
this is by far the closest i would tell.
and i just deleted some texts.
coz i realised i just disclosed too much.
and no, that shall not happen again.


stop.
shit happens.
so dont dwell on it.